With a stop-start live pre-launch ‘launch’, confusing bundles and, frankly, outrageous prices for single products, the PLouise Secure The Bag online unveiling was exactly what I expected it to be. A shambles! There were no proper product demos, no in-depth ingredient explanations and, as I anticipated, no top hairdresser on hand to explain why consumers should part with £18 a pop for shampoo and conditioner from what is predominantly a makeup brand.
“A good all-rounder” was what the hair care products were described as by one of PLouise’s social media hosts. Not exactly the sales pitch of the century. But, of course, the products sold out on TikTok anyway. It was always going to happen and, naturally, it wouldn’t be a PLouise launch if it wasn’t accompanied by hours of “it’s going to sell out, guys” and “get your orders in now”.
The PLouise Secure The Bag collection, officially launched at 6pm last night (January 10), comprises a new range of skin and hair products, in quirky fragrances like calorific chocolate and mixed fruit. There’s a new jelly-like sleeping mask, body lotion, makeup removers, mousse body wash, weird scrub, and the cutest Bad Bitch Energy lip balm you’ve ever seen. For bundle buyers, there was even a Bad Bitch soap with a straw embedded into the product. Then there was the packaging… All bright and colourful, which fitted in neatly with the brand’s supermarket-style launch staged at The Empire earlier in the day.
Credit where it is due - it was great to see all new products in stock and ready to ship. The pre-orders got a bit much last year. I also liked the bag element, which is practical and unique.
What I bought from the PLouise Secure The Bag collection
Was I tempted to buy anything from the PLouise Secure The Bag range? Of course! I wouldn’t be a PLouise fan if I didn’t sample ‘newness’ on a regular basis. I ordered Hair To The Throne shampoo and conditioner in mixed fruit and I couldn’t resist a Bad Bitch Energy lip balm. Total cost: £51. I have to repeat that - FIFTY-ONE POUNDS, for three basic items you could pick up in Superdrug for a tenner! It gets worse…
TikTok split my order into two, even though the products were ordered and paid for at the same time, and they added postage to the second part of the order (hence the £51 grand total). The shampoo and lip balm are arriving tomorrow. The conditioner may not arrive until January 20. So, I can’t try the shampoo and conditioner together for, possibly, a week and a half.
Before you all scream “Didn’t you see the hair care bundle for £25?” - no, I didn’t. I feel pig sick at the thought of paying top dollar for items that aren’t even going to arrive together. I did see the £40 bundles on TikTok and the £90 full collection. However, I only registered for the ‘live’ to get my hands on the shampoo and conditioner. Here’s why (and this isn’t a pretty story, either)...
I am influenced by things I see online and, like probably thousands of others, my head was recently turned by Facebook video demos for the TYMO Rovy Deep Waver. Beach curls in literally no time. As well as offering, what look like, standout mermaid results, this device is presented as easy to use with multiple built-in safety features. I wanted one, but didn’t like the look of TYMO’s ‘in dollars’ shipping costs and delivery times. So, what did I do? I turned to my old faithful, Amazon. At the same time, I figured I ought to invest in some new haircare products to really take my locks to the next level.
The hair device, along with its Compact sister product, are both available on the UK site and the Compact version, which promises tighter waves, is a Prime item. With an important Zoom call on the horizon, I ordered for next day delivery. Only, it didn’t arrive the next day. Or the day after that. In fact, Amazon can’t tell me when it’s going to arrive - if at all. Even though it is STILL selling the product as a Prime item! I can claim my money back on Monday, if it hasn’t arrived by then. I will be cancelling my Prime membership while I’m clicking the refund button, because this isn’t the first time the mother of all conveniences hasn’t been convenient at all.
So, there you have it - my reason for wanting to try new shampoo and conditioner. My recently purchased hair defence spray is on standby, looking a bit lonely.
After Secure The Bag, what’s next for PLouise?
Back to PLouise… As a fan of pretty much all the makeup and some of the skincare, I feel the brand needs to slow down. Too late for 2025, but something that should be considered for 2026. Yes, the growth of the business has been fantastic; not just for brand owner Paige personally but for the local economy in Stockport. The boom in sales last year created good quality jobs and, with The Empire being a top destination for devotees like me, it has brought hoards of visitors to an area not previously known for being a holiday hotspot. At the moment, what the brand is doing works.
But, long-term, customers will tire of non-stop new releases and the sheer cost of it all. I’ve seen die-hard fans put their entire collections up for sale recently, saying they have had enough and simply can’t keep up. Less is sometimes more. Bi-monthly releases that are accompanied by helpful product demos and ingredient explainers would go down better with consumers in the long-run. There would still be room for plenty of growth, and not just in the UK - the US and Europe are craving more from the brand. The skincare range, if products are always kept in stock, would generate loyal repeat business.
There would also continue to be lots of scope for social hosts Jas and Dan’s oh-so humorous videos that truly do make my day every time I watch them. The Black Friday panic episode was a corker. I must have watched it a hundred times. Very, very entertaining. If there were Baftas for comical social media content, it would definitely be in the running. I’d love to see them go on tour with the PLouise bus shop. I can see it parked up on the seafront here in Lyme Regis on a hot summer’s day. What an attraction it would be!
PLouise Secure The Bag release has taught me this lesson: sit back and wait - or navigate away from social media to the brand's official website. Don’t worry about a product selling out; it will be back in stock at some point. Clicking ‘buy now’ buttons in haste, desperate not to miss out, has cost me dear. I won’t be falling for it again (I hope).
I will update this post with product reviews and images when everything I ordered has arrived.
Bad Bitch Energy Lip Balm: Lovely! As well as arriving in the cutest packaging ever, this is another PLouise product that comes on a keyring. The balm is a good addition to the collection and offers a melt-on-the-lips solid alternative to the Protect Your Pout bestseller. In fact, I prefer it. To me, it feels a lot more moisturising. It's going on my handbag right now!
I ordered this product in the Mixed Fruit flavour. It's definitely fruity and refreshing, but without being overpowering. It's literally going everywhere I go. I absolutely love it!
I received this month's free magazine with the order, bagging a Fruity Fix setting spray (pictured with the lip balm, second image above). This is a pre-release product and I can't wait to give it a try.
Hair To The Throne Shampoo: I received a 380ml plastic carton with a flip-up lid and the product is in the fragrance Mixed Fruit. This shampoo is thick and creamy. It's pastel green and the scent is not overwhelming. You only need a small amount as it lathers really well. It also rinses out easily. Sulphate and paraben free, it is safe to use on all types of hair including extensions.
The packaging says the product comprises ingredients that nourish and strengthen the hair. A full list is available to view on PLouise's website. After towel drying, I used a hairdryer with no further products - to see what my hair looked like dry. It feels slightly volumised and has retained its shine. It's a lovely shampoo but I'm not sure it's worth £18. Continued use will determine its ultimate value in my routine.
As a self-care experience, this is spot on. It feels indulgent with a luxurious, silky lather and wonderful aroma. After use, my hair smells fresh and clean. I am looking forward to receiving the conditioner - it could well seal the deal for future purchases.
Hair To The Throne Conditioner: This product arrived two days after the shampoo. It comes in the same size carton as the shampoo and is also pastel green. However, that's where the similarities end. They are distinctly different products. The conditioner is super-silky and instantly smoothing. I applied a small amount to the ends of my hair and left for one minute before quickly massaging all over the head and then rinsing.
There was no sticky residue left after the rinse and the conditioner quickly proved to be an excellent detangler. The shampoo and conditioner combo left my hair feeling weighless and shiny. I've used the products on a work night, when I'd normally straighten my hair ready for it to be tied in a high ponytail in the morning. No need for straightners tonight! My hair looks sleek enough.
The detangling properties in the conditioner are an important plus-point for me. I hate dealing with tangles! I've got hair that is half-way down my back and I 'shed' a lot. Preventing breakage during the after-wash brush is essential. I like this conditioner - a lot - and I will buy it again.
I think PLouise missed an opportunity to be extra unique with their hair products. It would have been nice to see different labelling so users can easily recognise which is which - or the 'Shampoo' and 'Conditioner' wording displayed a lot bigger. Distinguishing the two when your face is home to a steaming waterfall can be tricky. Other than that, the conditioner totally performed. I've been admiring my hair from the back and, yes, it looks good.
UPDATE: I've now being using my Hair To The Throne products for two weeks. For the first time in a very long time, I actually felt good walking home from work today. I untied my hair and the bounce and shine was absolutely lovely. For the past few years, I've felt like an absolute rag-bag after hours of physical hard graft. I've even avoided people because I was worried about how awful my hair looked. I'm so impressed, I will be repurchasing both products.
*As an aside to Secure The Bag products, I never received my TYMO Rovy Compact deep waver. Amazon said it was 'possibly lost' and gave me a refund. It's a viral product and, if they'd chosen to be a bit more forthcoming, the 'possibly lost' may have instead read: "The supplier has sold out and we don't know when the product will be back in stock."
I immediately cancelled my Prime membership, of course. I noted that I'd purchased 95 things from Amazon in the past few months, including a large piece of furniture and electricals. I feel quite depressed that, after years of loyal custom that has involved not an inconsiderable sum of money, my business meant nothing to them in the end.
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